Positivity – not just for the dying

Just a quick thought. But – even if there was a proven causation between fat and all the ills of mankind (it’s blamed for everything from cancer to ingrown hairs after all) I would still not try to lose weight.

Why? Because dammit I’ve been there and done that and I am sick and tired of the negativity that you have to embrace to think that way. Sick and tired of seeing my body and it’s defences against famine as an enemy. Sick and tired of having to concentrate so strongly on everything I put in my mouth, worrying about whether that cracker has too much cheese on it and making myself drink water to disguise the fact I’m hungry. Sick and tired of expending all my energy to try and fail to meet the expectations of others while those others simultaneously chastise me for not doing so (they can tell, you see, because I continue to be fat). So y’know what? Even if all the current research goes up in ashes and HAES is turned on it’s head I don’t care – I will continue to live my life fat and free.

But I want to know what blip it is in our collective psyches that allows us only to let go of those negative judgement when we’re dying? Think about it. The only group of people in our Western Civilisation who are told to throw caution to the winds – to live as though there is no tomorrow, to be happy in and with the moment, to cease judgement and just be – are those who don’t have long to live. Why don’t we embrace that philosophy a little sooner? Why don’t we live our lives in the moment, as we are right this second, without thinking of how we could be ‘better’?

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2 Responses

  1. I have a friend who is a yoga and meditation instructor. He’s been trying to teach me about living in the moment for years.
    I find it a real struggle to stop ‘the voices’ It’s frustrating as I can be having a lovely time and all of a sudden a dark little negative voice pops and sits in the background telling me I’m not good enough.
    I’m too fat, too pale, too unfit, not bright enough, not creative enough, I have too much body hair for a girl, I’m not thoughtful enough and not kind enough…
    I spent a few days recently with my Mother who has had some big health scares over the years. Cancer and various heart problems to name just a few. She said it dawned on her several years ago to stop trying to be perfect. She used to keep the house in pristine order worried others would think badly of her if she had a dirty floor or bench. She grew up in an extremely poor household and I suspect she’d been making up for it.
    Now she is 70 and does what she wants to do. Her house is a now little untidy. ( I have to admit to wiping down a few surfaces whilst there) : )
    She said she regrets all that time she wasted worrying what others thought of her. I’m glad she discovered all this now while she is still fit to be doing the real things she loves rather than on her death bed.

    I do hope what I’ve written is on topic I have a tendency to waffle…!

    • I have those voices too and like you mine are very negative, and always have been. But I’ve decided to fight it – I’m sick and tired of putting with crap both from myself and from others. :)

      Your mother has the right idea. I look at my Grandmother who married two abusive men in a row in order to look ‘normal and respectable’ (whatever the hell that is) and I think “Why? Why do we do this to ourselves?” Especially now when we have so much comparitive freedom… why box ourselves in like this?

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